SHOW NOTES
Growing up in an environment where a family member or close one is lost to addiction has a lasting impact on the way you view the world. Our guest today, Kimberly Dewberry, saw her Dad crumble into alcoholism and prescription drug abuse when she was a teenager.
For decades she went through rebellion, rocky relationships and carried guilt on her shoulders.
In this episode we learn how she took control of her own life, grew a deep relationship with God, and found closure through forgiveness. Today, Kimberly is an author, blogger and happily married with six children.
Push-Pull
When someone close that you look up to falls into addiction, it’s a heavy burden for you to process. Overtime, it’s easy to subtly blame yourself for not being able to ‘rescue’ them. You feel you want to runaway from them, but you also feel pulled to save them.
Kimberly noticed that her father grew silent towards her; to her it meant he no longer loved her. This interpretation of silence applied to all her future relationships – including God. Whenever God didn’t respond to her prayers, she believed it meant He didn’t love her.
“Let go and let God handle it”
You’re not in control of people, events or things. When someone falls into addiction, it’s not because of you nor your role to be the savior. Kimberley learned to let go and give her father space to choose to recover or not. God can handle it and answer their prayers, not you.
Closure
In a moving encounter with her father later on in life, she learned the power of forgiveness; “God forgives us, and in return we forgive others”.
By forgiving her father’s actions, Kimberly felt an overwhelming liberation that she could move forward with life. It’s a powerful action that will give you closure.
“Don’t Do It Alone”
If you’re with someone in a state of dysfunction, find help as soon as you can. Kimberley entered her self on to a recovery program to receive the full support she needed to move on.
Kim defines recovery as not something “just for addicts, it’s for anyone who places other things in front of God”. Kim’s best advice is to seek help through a recovery program or professional support.
You may not be in control of a close one’s dysfunction, but you’re in control of your own function – or potential dysfunction.
Resources:
‘Three Weeks to Forgiveness’ by Kimberly Dewberry
This is so good! I’ve felt so guilty for years for my parent’s issues. Thank you for all your insightful and helpful posts Laura! They always speak to my heart! ❤
Hi, Donna! We’re glad that today’s episode spoke to your heart. Thanks for being a faithful listener.