Category: Personal Growth

SHOW NOTES

About the Series

We hope you had a “beautiful” week, after listening to our episode on aesthetics last week!  If you are new to us, HI! We are Vincent and Laura Ketchie, a husband and wife therapist team and we are Relationship Helpers.  Our podcast aims to give you tips to help you improve relationships, as well as help you to grow personally.

This week marks our seventh part in a ten part series on “101 Activities That You Can Do To Improve Your Mood.”  We have been taking a look at how depression can cause overwhelm, which leads many people to feel powerless in overcoming their poor mood.

We have divided the over one hundred activities into ten different themes.  Each week we feature a different theme.  Last week we took a look at what makes life beautiful and how you can be a part of that. Be sure to give it a listen.

Today we will discuss creating and learning.  Many of these activities are related to last week’s episode, except that in last week’s episode we talked about being the spectator of them, this time, you are actually creating the lovely sound or artwork!

Make a Joyful Noise!

As with each week before, remember Philippians 4: 8. Think on things true, noble, just, pure, lovely and of good report. It is hard to be negative when your mind is focusing on these things.  Some of today’s activities can even be considered as worship. (Remember that if you question your singing voice or ability to carry a tune!)

28. Paint in watercolor.  Watercolor painting is inexpensive and can be done quickly. Studies have found that painting can lower stress hormone levels.  Art is also a great way to engage kids.

41. Take a sculpting class. Sculpting can be a good way to reduce stress and get in touch with your feelings. You may even want to make a family sculpture to better understand your role in your family.

45. Learn some magic tricks. Learning magic tricks is not only fun, but it can help you feel more confident. It can be a great ice-breaker in social settings. Learning magic can help you build many other skills like good hand-eye coordination.

52. Learn to play an instrument.  Learning to play an instrument develops self-confidence, especially when you learn to play a piece that is difficult or that you have heard a professional play before.  Studies show that it helps to reduce the stress hormone, cortisol. 

55. Cook a new and different meal. Cooking provides many mental health benefits like stress relief, relief from boredom, improved memory, attention and focus, increased sensory awareness, and a sense of accomplishment.

More Activities in Creating and Learning

63. Learn a new language. Depression oftentimes limits your thinking. By expanding your knowledge, you expand your world. You have many more opportunities.

71. Take a class at the local community college.  Never stop learning! Learning beyond school-age years can improve our mental wellbeing.  It can give us a sense of purpose, improve self-confidence and self-esteem.

85. Read a biography.  Journalist Shane Snow calls reading biographies “self-help in disguise.”  By the time the person’s book is written, we get to read how that person overcame obstacles in their life and how they succeeded in life.  Reading biographies can be motivating.

88. Start a hobby that is inexpensive.  Performing a hobby can lower blood pressure. Finding purpose in your hobby can make what you do more successful.  Regularly participating in a hobby lowers depression. 

89. Knit a shawl. Studies have shown that knitting is soothing, calming the heart rate and is therapeutic for conditions such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders and post traumatic stress disorder.

Conclusion

Your depression may have told you the lie “you can’t teach old dogs new tricks.” Regardless if you take up knitting and you make a beautiful scarf or a ratty one, the point is not what you produce but the process. In fact, continuing your knitting will only improve your skills and coordination and the end products will improve with time. 

Of course, this analogy applies to any of the above listed activities. Don’t let depression discourage you from trying something new based on the premise that you are not “good” at something.  If you are struggling with this mentality, I would encourage you to face the new activity like a child. No expectations.

SHOW NOTES

About the Series

Have you felt overwhelmed lately?  Maybe a little depressed, too?  If so, Relationship Helpers is here to help. 

If you are joining us for the first time, WELCOME! Today’s podcast episode is the seventh in a ten-part series on one hundred and one activities you can do to improve your mood. We have divided the activities into ten different categories:  (activities) involving God, exercise, slowing down, fun, animals and nature, socializing, aesthetics, creating and learning, touch and smell, and helping.  

If you are feeling depressed, please reference episode 53 “How Discouragement Leads to Depression”.  In that episode we go into detail about how depression is diagnosed. We discuss the difference between dysthymia and potentially life-threatening Major Depression. 

A Major Depressive Episode is a serious matter and should be treated by a medical/mental health professional.  Today’s tips work to supplement any ongoing treatment, but do not serve as a “cure-all.”

Aesthetics (Appreciating Beauty)

We will focus today on what makes life beautiful—aesthetics.  When we are in a funk or a bad mood, it seems like we miss the good that is right in front of us. We hope today’s episode serves as a reminder of some things you can enjoy that God has created. 

In Psalm 65: 5-8, David paints a picture about God with words describing His creation. “By awesome deeds You answer us in righteousness, O God of our salvation, You who are the trust of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest sea; 6Who establishes the mountains by His strength, Being girded with might; Who stills the roaring of the seas, The roaring of their waves, And the tumult of the peoples.They who dwell in the ends of the earth stand in awe of Your signs; You make the dawn and the sunset shout for joy.” 

I don’t know about you, but when I read that, I feel like I can “see” that. When you see a beautiful sunset, do you think of God? Where does your mind go? 

Each week we have been examining our activities through the lens of Philippians 4: 8, thinking on things true, noble, just, pure, lovely and of good report. 

Whatever is…Lovely

Which of these activities would you like to try first?

13.  Listen to your favorite music. When you listen to music you enjoy, your body reacts. Your blood flow increases, stress-related hormones like cortisol decrease and your pain eases. A 2016 study showed that both music and meditation improved the mood of older adults suffering from mental decline.

14.  Go to a play or musical. Going to the theatre gives you the opportunity to explore your feelings in a different way. Some shows deal with deep sensitive issues while others help you to laugh and relax you. When you are enjoying a play or musical, you are not enjoying it alone and in the complete dark, but you are enjoying it with a crowd of other people. This sharing of an experience helps to enhance your well-being.

16.  Get up early and watch a sunrise. Taking the time to relax and watch a sunrise can really is a good way to reset your mind. You can take your mind off of all the busy things and focus on the natural aesthetics of nature. When you appreciate beauty, your spirits are lifted.

21. Read a classic novel. Reading can help you get perspective. Your mind is activated more and you learn more about your state of mind. As you learn more about how you think, then you can learn to change your behavior as well.

62. Listen to a concert. A study from the Royal College of Music in London has shown that live concerts can actually reduce stress and anxiety.

More Activities That Include Aesthetics

73. Photograph nature or some interesting cityscape or people. Photography motivates you to get outside and interact with people or nature. It is a way of expressing yourself without using words.

98. Visit an art museum.   Art museums provide positive distractions, have a calming-effect, decreases anxiety, increases optimism, and leads to a reduced sense of social isolation.

23. Go on a train ride. A 2013 study shows that travel prevents dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, especially in retirees. On a train, you have time to admire the beauty of the landscape. Taking a vacation, even a short one, brings many health benefits.

42. Visit a car museum. A 2011 study from the Norwegian University of Science and Technology shows that visiting museums can lower the risk of anxiety and depression in men. Museums reduce stress and have a greater impact on well-being as playing sports do.

Conclusion:

“The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.” Psalm 19: 1 describes finding God in what we can see.  He is so creative.  He gave us our senses to be able to experience His creations in many different ways. 

We hope today you will feel encouraged to seek out some of these healthy, beneficial ways to engage your senses, to calm your mind and to see God’s handiwork.  

SHOW NOTES

Introduction to Series

We have reached the halfway point in our series, “101 Activities to Improve Your Mood.” If you’re visiting us for the first time today, welcome! We hope you feel encouraged by our discussion and find new ideas to lift your mood.  Vincent and I are therapists who work frequently with clients who struggle with depression and anxiety. 

Discouragement and low motivation can make it seem next to impossible to want to do anything.  BUT, when you are faced with a list of one hundred and one coping skills, it is kind of hard to rationalize your way out of doing just one!

Be sure to check out weeks one through five where we discussed activities involving God, slowing down, fun, and animals and nature. We will finish off the next few weeks with aesthetics, creating and learning, touch and smell, and helping.

Please note that God is the underlying theme to all of these themes.  In Him we move and have our being, and we would be remiss to not recognize His fingerprints on His creations. 

Socialize

Paul reminds us in Philippians 4: 8 to think on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable. When we do this, an un-understandable peace through Jesus comes upon us! His words to the church in Philippi were meant to encourage unity and steadfastness.  

Depression is a kind of bondage.  It shackles its victims to secrecy and shame. It is the furtherest thing from peace and is such a lonely road.  As a therapist I find that when clients talk to someone about their depression, it starts to break the chains.  When its not a secret any more, it loses its grip—its power. 

Our God is a relational God. He made us in His image and made us to be in relationship. When we are not, we are missing an important component of what He intended for us. 

We learn what it is like to be in relationship with Him from the Bible, but we also learn about being in relationship with others.  Relationship, in some ways, is like food and water.  We need it to survive.

What are some activities that can draw you closer to others?  

1. Talk to someone about it.  By sharing your thoughts with others, you allow them to understand you.  When you feel understood, an emotional burden is lifted.  You feel like you are not alone.  (Galatians 6:2 says, “Carry each others burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”)

12.  Visit an old friend. Healthy individuals have a wide array of support. They have numerous people where they can find emotional support. Even introverted or quiet people can have 4 to 5 people that they are comfortable talking with. Having only one or two persons to speak with really limits a person’s perspective and may keep them stuck in an unhealthy mental state.

24. Have friends over for a meal.  According to some studies, having close friends may help you fight disease. Inviting people into your home lessens loneliness and solitude that promote depression. 

36. Call an old friend.  Having no friends leads to psychological dysfunction.  Picking up the phone and giving old friends a call is good for mental and physical health. 

47. Play chess at a local game room. Playing casual games helps to reduce stress according to a recent study. Board games help to reduce isolation, keep the brain younger,  and develop social skills.

More  Socializing Ideas

67. Play board games with the family. Game night with the family is good way to connect with each other in a healthy environment. Playing games together reduces stress, sharpens cognitive skills, and reduces the risk of mental illness.

92. Join a book club. “As a rough rule of thumb, if you belong to no groups but decide to join one, you cut your risk of dying over the next year in half,” says scientist Robert D. Putnam in his book Bowling Alone.  Being a part of group also influences the health decisions people make, leading them to healthier lifestyle choices.  The more groups you are a part of, the less likely you are to become depressed.  If you suffer from depression, joining a group could help you recover and prevent relapse. 

96. Participate in a counseling group.  Group counseling teaches social skills.  It provides you the chance to hear many perspectives on what you’re going through. Group provides support and encouragement as you develop new coping skills. Here are some free counseling groups you may want to explore – Celebrate Recovery, GriefShare, DivorceCare, or Stephen Ministries.

57. Learn ballroom dancing. As with other exercise, dancing releases large amounts of dopamine – “the feel good hormone”. Dancing not only provides exercise, but also a lot of socialization.

35. Cross-stitch. Cross stitchers find that cross stitching creates calm, reduces stress and when done in a group setting, promotes community.

Conclusion

Everyone has a story. Everyone has lost or will have lost. Everyone has sinned and makes mistakes. 

The trouble is, sometimes we lose sight of this about each other. It’s like we get lost in our own individual deep, dark pit and we forget that many others reside in their own dark places. Before you know it, there is a world populated by people caught up in their own storms, unable to see past their strife to recognize other’s struggles.

This is the problem with epidemic-level depression. Depression tells us the lie that no one else feels the way we do and keeps us mired in our own despair.  Then consider the fact that millions of us suffer from depression and you have a world of disconnected people.

Many times the treatment for depression is doing the very thing that depression makes us fear:  talking to other people about it, sharing our experiences, empathizing with others. 

You are not alone. You are loved. 

SHOW NOTES

About the Series

We hope you had “fun” putting into place some new coping skills last week with our episode on fun activities to improve your mood.  If you’re joining us for the first time, Vincent and I are mental health counselors.  We work regularly with people who are struggling with depression and anxiety.

Today’s podcast episode is part four of a ten-part series on “101 Activities to Improve Your Mood.” If you missed them, we welcome you to check out the last few weeks episodes on mood and God, slowing down, and fun!

In the upcoming weeks we will offer discussion and information on activities you can do to elevate your mood and lessen anxiety.  Next week we will discuss social activities, followed by aesthetics, creating and learning, touch and smell, and helping in the following weeks. 

We are urged in Philippians 4:8 by Paul to think about “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable.”  Paul is preaching a message of unity and steadfastness to the church at Philippi. One thing that depression can do is tear us apart—alienate us; leave us feeling disconnected and lonely.

Animals & Nature

Much like we discussed last week about babies, animals, especially pets, can provide wonderful opportunities to laugh and brighten our spirits. Enjoying scenes from nature also helps us to see outside of ourselves and to feel like a part of something “bigger.”  So today, we will look at some activities that you can do to get you amongst God’s great, creative world! 

Whatever is Lovely….

3. Pet a dog. In 2011, psychologists at Miami University and St. Louis University discovered from their findings in three experiments that pet owners displayed less loneliness and higher self-esteem. In 2012, a study in the American Journal of Cardiology showed that dog owners have hearts that adapt better than those of non-pet owners. In a 2008 study presented at a meeting of the American Stroke Association people who never owned a cat had a 40 % increased risk of death by heart attack over 20 year period. So if you don’t like dogs, then I guess a cat will do just as well.

11.  Go to the park and watch the squirrels and the birds. Researchers at the British Trust for Ornithology, the University of Exeter, and the University of Queensland have found that the more the number of birds viewed in an afternoon reduces depression, anxiety, and stress in an individual.

22. Visit a state park. Taking a walk or hike in nature will benefit your mental health. A 2015 study from the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences stated, “Participants who went on a 90-min walk through a natural environment reported lower levels of rumination and showed reduced neural activity in an area of the brain linked to risk for mental illness compared with those who walked through an urban environment.”  A 2017 study in Germany corroborates the idea that time in nature is good for our brains.

39. View the stars through a telescope.  Or better yet visit a planetarium. Gazing at the stars is a good way to relax your mind and get your thoughts beyond yourself. This may also be a good date if you have anxiety about eating our and a movie.

43. Go see the fall colors in the mountains. Being in nature and reflecting on nature can alleviate host of mental health issues. Forest therapy where you pay someone to guide you through a forest to remedy ailments is actually practiced in a few areas.

More Whatever is Lovely….

46. Play with a cat. Cats can be a safe, calming constant in your life. They provide unconditional, uncomplicated friendship among other benefits.

50. Put up a bird feeder so that you can watch the birds. According to a study in Southern England, bird watching in urban areas can reduce anxiety and stress.

69. Watch a nature show on PBS or the BBC. A study by BBC and the University of California Berkeley has found that watching nature shows causes the viewers to increased happiness and reduced stress. Advanced facial mapping was used to determine a person’s emotional state.

91. Climb a tree.  Nothing makes you feel like a kid again like climbing a tree.  But it also builds self-confidence and self-reliance.  It physically removes you from the stressors of your life.

93. Visit a zoo.   The Attention Restoration Theory claims that an individual will concentrate better after observing nature.  Being in the moment with nature also improves sense of well-being, and wakes the senses.

Conclusion

Last week we had a blast discussing fun and what makes us laugh.  It’s only fitting that we include animals and nature this week.

As we talked about last time, there are certain activities that re-connect us to simpler times, when we had a different outlook as children.  I think today’s episode with animals and nature can do just that.

We have become so accustomed to artificial lights, climate-controlled buildings, and blue screens that we’ve lost sight of the simplicity and comfort of this beautiful and fascinating world that our God created for us.  We hope you feel encouraged to go out and enjoy what He has made for us!

SHOW NOTES

About the series

Last week, we talked about sloooowing down.  This week our focus is pepping things up;  we’re going to talk about fun!  If you are joining us for the first time, or have not listened for the last few weeks, we are in the midst of a 10-part series entitled “101 Ways to Cope With Depression and Anxiety.” If you’ve experienced depression, you know that it can be difficult to feel motivated to do much of anything.  Our hope is that struggling individuals see that they can do at least one thing out of our list of 101, if not more!

Before we start talking about fun, we’ll take a brief moment to recap what has been discussed thus far.  Each week has a different theme. We started out with God.  In Him we move and have our being. He created us in His image.  He created a beautiful world and our five senses. He is the thread that weaves through our series.  Although we devoted an entire episode to activities that are specific to Him, we can honor Him through other activities.

Last week we discussed activities that are intended to slow us down from the rat-race pace of this modern world.  You may want to reference that episode if you’re looking to do something less energized. 

We will round out the series for the next six weeks with animals and nature, socializing, aesthetics, creating and learning, touch and smell, and helping.

Introduction to Fun

We’re excited about today’s list because, it’s well…fun! God has gifted us our five senses to enjoy sights, sounds, textures, tastes, and smells. He has also given us the ability to smile and laugh. 

Vincent and I are blessed to be new parents and are enjoying the sounds of our little son’s laughter.  When a baby laughs, it seems to press the “pause button” on any negativity going on around you. And if you’re stressed out parents, your baby’s laughter may help you to relieve some of that tension!

Laura:  One thing I remember doing as a child was making paper air planes.  Not just any paper airplanes. I colored and designed them.  They had names.  I kept them in a bag.  My sister, my cousin, other neighborhood kids, got in on the fun and we all had bags of paper airplanes named and designed.  We would have contests to see which airplane could fly the furthest. 

One thing that I like to do with my counseling clients is to ask them what they do for recreation.  Many times I’ll ask them what activities they enjoyed as a child.  Have you stopped doing what brought you joy?   Did you like to play outside?  Color? Create things?  Are you still doing these things?  What would happen if you tried doing them again?  How would you make that happen? 

Over the course of this series we have been encouraging you to take a look at coping through the lens of Philippians 4: 8.  Think on things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely and of good report.  I think in some ways all of today’s activities fall under “pure”.  They take us to a simpler, more laid-back time.  Imagine life skipping the joys of childhood? 

Fun Activities List

4.  Go to the movies and watch a comedy. According to the Mayo clinic, laughter stimulates many organs, activates and relieves your stress response, and soothes tension.

19.  Eat some ice cream. I am not suggesting that you gorge yourself in ice cream – that would be gluttonous. But researchers in Belgium have found that eating fatty acid foods like ice cream lessen a depressed mood – as us ice cream lovers have long suspected. So a little ice cream “in moderation” can help you feel better.

32. Blow bubbles outside.  Blowing bubbles tricks your body into calming down. You slow and deepen your breath. 

40. Go watch a baseball game. It can be relaxing, but it also can be a time that you let some of your emotions out as well. This emotional release around a lot of people can be therapeutic.

44. Eat at a fancy restaurant. Eating a good healthy meal can fill your tummy, but it can also help reduce anxiety and depression. More expensive restaurants many times provide healthier food – here are some foods that help with depression.

49. Watch a mystery movie or tv show. Although watching too much TV can be bad for you, watching a relaxing or intriguing show can help to reduce your stress according to a recent study.

64. Fly a kite. Kite flying offers a wide variety of health benefits like being in nature, exercise, socialization, and stress reduction. It is inexpensive and family friendly as well.

66. Whistle. Whistling, humming, singing, and laughing are ways to destress and help you to relax. A work-play balance is imperative to keep you emotionally healthy.

82. Work on a crossword puzzle.  The challenges of regularly performing crossword puzzles improves a person’s ability to solves life’s problems.

83. Watch a cartoon.  Psychotherapist Dr. Laurel Steinberg finds that children’s programming promotes community, relationship, family, teamwork and the concept of good overcoming evil. These concepts are an escape from worry and sadness and improves mood.

94. Take a ride on a motorcycle.  Riding a motorcycle is one of the few rides where the journey is the destination.  It requires the driver to develop strong concentration and puts the driver in the “now”.  It reduces stress and can improve emotional health.

Conclusion

Never lose sight of the things that brought you pure, unadulterated joy as a child.  You may benefit from re-connecting with those things.  If not, maybe today’s list will provide you with encouragement to start on some new, healthy activities to bring the fun out of you!